Daniëlle

unfollowlng:

seenaill:

unfollowlng:

If you think your mom overreacts just remember once my mom cancelled our trip to New York because I refused to eat the meatloaf she made

my mom accused me of selling my birth certificate and social security to the black market when she couldn’t find them

you win

(via icyavocado)

bethosaurus:

sunslammerdown:

rockpapertheodore:

roachpatrol:

just-shower-thoughts:

What if aliens visited Earth during the Jurassic Period, found it to be occupied with a bunch of mean, giant lizards and thought “Well, fuck this planet” and never came back?

what if when humans went out into the galaxy all the aliens panicked because if the dinosaurs’ tiny fur snacks now had spaceships and laser blasters and interstellar colonies then what the fuck were the dinosaurs up to??? 

#important human policy: do not let any aliens know the dinosaurs are extinct#EVER

jurassic park movies as extremely important interstellar propaganda

This is probably the best post on Tumblr tbh it combines aliens, dinosaurs, space travel, evolution, and borderline absurd humor in one thing

(via her-last-bow)

rlckrolled:

Panic! In front of the cute boy

(via perks-of-being-chinese)

princeharrehs:

princeharrehs:

princeharrehs:

omfg i just ordered pizza and as i was about to hang up i said love you out of habit and the guy said it back and after a whole minute of dead silence he just tells me that he hopes that i’m not expecting a discount on the pizza just cause we confessed our undying love for each other! oMFG!

guys! he sent me a note on one of the napkins and i just

nearly a year later, we’re dating

(via fake-mermaid)

jcatgrl:

copperbadge:

persinetteinthetower:

moriartythetease:

So what happens if two people who have promised their firstborn to separate witches have a child together? Do they both just pop up in the nursery and have a custody battle?

I need a book about a little girl whose parents had promised their firstborn to different witches and the only way that both ends of the deal were fulfilled was for them to have joint custody of the child.

I love it!

And then the witches, forced to share a cottage while raising their joint stolen child, fall in love…

#more witch-centric lesbian fairytale rom-coms#….a sentence I never thought I’d type

(via perks-of-being-chinese)

frankoceanfanclub:

when i get a runny nose

This is honestly so relatable and I’m going to need everyone else to step it up a notch

(via stability)